When deciding what you want your wedding day to look like, the idea of a huge wedding surrounded by every person you know (and probably a few you don’t know) might sound anything but magical.

First and foremost, let’s define what an elopement actually is. Eloping used to mean running away to get married in secret, and if you Google it, you’ll find it still thinks that’s the definition. However, elopements have adopted a new meaning in recent years, and though every elopement is different, here’s how I like to define it:

Eloping is ”a celebration of marriage between two people who choose to go against the grain to have a meaningful and personal wedding day experience, usually through an immersive experience in the great outdoors.”

The way you get married is a very personal decision that should reflect who you are, so you should do it in a way that makes you feel fulfilled.

Here are 6 signs eloping may be the right decision for you!

Eloping could be right for you if…

1. You want a stress-free wedding day

If the thought of a massive to-do list, family drama, and constant decisions throughout your engagement make your palms sweat, having an elopement is probably a great fit for you! Big weddings come with an entire list of decisions and “required” traditions, while planning an elopement can help you avoid unnecessary stress.

Elopements are so fun because while things can definitely still go wrong, it’s so much easier to pivot when needed. Pop-up thunderstorm right before your ceremony? No need to frantically move 200 chairs indoors or worry about the decor you spent thousands on getting ruined before anyone even got a chance to see it. It’s much easier to embrace the mess and enjoy your day when there’s no pressure of perfect plans.

To help reduce your planning stress even further, I personally offer planning help for all of my eloping couples! I help with location scouting, timeline building, permit assistance, vendor recommendations, and activity ideas, on top of full day photography coverage, which takes care of the bulk of planning! In a lot of ways, hiring the right elopement photographer can be the perfect solution for just about everything you need.

2. You want a personal experience focused on your relationship, not a party for everyone else

Many of the typical elements of traditional weddings leave couples spending a lot of money on things that don’t last, and they end up putting the focus of their wedding on throwing a big party rather than putting the emphasis on celebrating their marriage.

On average, up to 50% of a couple’s budget goes just to the reception. Instead of having to put loads of money toward catering, alcohol, rentals, music, and a venue, that money can be allocated for elopement day activities, or even a vendor you wouldn’t have been able to afford otherwise, like a videographer or private chef.

Even if you do choose to bring along a small group of your favorite people to your elopement, they’ll likely be respectful of your desire for privacy. An elopement can even be like a mini getaway for your loved ones! While the two of you are off spending some time together exploring the area or having a private ceremony, your guests can be hanging out at your rental or even explore the sights nearby until you come back to celebrate with them.

You also don’t have to spend any of your day alone if you don’t want to! I believe the right people can help make your day something truly special, and there’s nothing wrong with having your favorite humans present the whole time.

3. You want an intentional start to your marriage surrounded by nature

Elopements are completely unique to every couple, which is what makes them so special! There’s no rulebook, so you can plan a day that aligns perfectly with the kind of experience you want to have.

Imagine saying your vows while standing in front of a distant mountain range, the ridges dappled with white snow, as golden evening sunlight hits the peaks juuuust right. While the visual itself is probably enough to skip the golf course ballroom or the old barn venue, the feeling you’ll have while completely surrounded by such beauty together is second to none.

Nature brings a certain ease and quiet seclusion to a day that is generally not seen as very peaceful, which is why so many couples opt for an elopement day centered around the outdoors. You get to spend your wedding day among wildlife, natural landscapes, and only the people you want there most. What could be a better way to begin your marriage?

4. You’re laid back or introverted

Elopements are a really great fit for couples who like to go with the flow, value experiences more than stuff, and like to do their own thing.

I myself am an ambivert (half introvert, half extrovert), so I find myself most content finding a happy medium of planning and spontaneity. I create itineraries for all my trips with my husband, but they’re more of a well-prepared structure based on research than a rigid timeline, and it works really well for us! I craft timelines for couples in a similar way, and it creates all the space you need to enjoy your experience.

Rather than following a strict, minute-by-minute wedding timeline, eloping leaves room for you to soak everything in without feeling rushed.

5. You value environmental sustainability

The average big wedding in the United States produces over 400 pounds of garbage, while an elopement could produce significantly less—or even zero!

The wedding industry certainly has a long way to go in terms of sustainability (confetti all over the ground, single-use plastic, balloons, drink containers going to landfills from venues that don’t utilize recycling, etc), but many vendors in the elopement industry already place a huge amount of importance on environmentally-friendly choices. The great outdoors is our venue, and protecting it allows couples to continue having meaningful elopement experiences in those naturally beautiful places.

I’m proud to be an elopement vendor that donates 10% of all my packages to organizations that work toward environmental sustainability efforts. Having a minimally impactful elopement is one huge way many couples are helping shift the wedding industry in a better direction, making strides to a world less impacted by corporations and climate change.

Weddings are a special occasion, yes, but I don’t think special occasions are a reason to be wasteful with our decision making. Choosing an eco-friendly elopement ensures we’re doing our part to keep our world beautiful and habitable for the next generation, and is yet another way you can look back feeling really good about your choice to elope.

Learn how you can have an eco-friendly elopement here!

6. You want to remember your wedding day with zero regrets

We likely all know someone who has at least one regret from their wedding day. I hear those stories all the time, and it really does hurt my heart. Getting married is more than just a piece of paper, and your wedding day is more than just a long list of traditions to uphold or expectations to meet. Choosing to marry the person you love is a commitment to a life well-lived together, and I think the best way to begin that season confidently is making decisions based on what’s most important to you, not what anyone says you have to do.

Ultimately, having an elopement is all about placing value on what matters most to you, eliminating the drama and stress of a huge wedding, and cultivating a fulfilling experience to begin the next chapter of your lives together.

Common Elopement Questions

Even if you’re feeling that tug on your heartstrings that eloping might be the perfect fit, you probably still have some questions! Here’s a few answers to common questions about eloping.

Is eloping legal?

As long as you have your proper paperwork in place and follow all the laws and requirements for the state you’re marrying in, eloping is absolutely a legal act (and a legal marriage)! In certain states, you do not have to have an officiant or witnesses, which is appealing if you want to keep things as private as possible.

In New Hampshire, for example, al you have to do is fill out some paperwork at the County Clerk’s office in any county (an appointment might be required) and obtain your marriage license for $30. There’s no waiting period which makes things quick and easy!

If you choose to elope in a state where witnesses are required, don’t worry if you don’t have any guests present! Your vendors can be your witnesses (I’ve done it before and it’s a huge honor!) If you still prefer that someone else lead you through a formal ceremony, you can absolutely have an officiant or a loved one do that for you.

Is eloping cheaper than a wedding?

Weddings cost an average of $35k in the United States, and elopements fall under a very wide price range that can be hard to pinpoint since they’re all so different. Some elopements are under $10k, and others cost the same as a traditional wedding or more. It all depends on where you decide to spend your money and what matters most to you, and allocating it towards the right vendors and experiences that make your elopement day more intentional and smaller scale will result in a higher quality experience all around.

The vendors you hire completely depends on the structure of your day, and often the most obvious differences come into play if you’re having guests or not, and whether you have a sit-down celebration of some kind. For example, your “venue” may be a state park or national park. Wedding venues in the US can cost up to $12k on average, while a national park permit (if required) is usually anywhere from $75-$350. Even if you book a rental that allows parties for a gathering of your favorite people and spend $1,500 on a few nights there, that still leaves a significant amount of your budget available for some really amazing vendors that can help you create a once-in-a-lifetime elopement day experience.

Will people be upset if we elope?

There’s always a chance the people in your lives may not understand your decision to elope. In the end, what matters most is that you feel safe to be your authentic self on your wedding day, and only the people who can support that should be there with you. Your partner is your best friend and biggest fan, and at the end of the day, what matters is that you commit your lives to one another in a way that means something to you.

Read my guide on how to tell your family & friends you’ve decided to elope.

Are elopements only for outdoorsy, adventurous couples?

Elopements may involve some adventurous elements like hiking or a guided helicopter tour, but ultimately your day should reflect the things that energize you on a normal basis. If you enjoy rock climbing, you can include that in your day! If you’re the kind of couple who prefers to drive around and sightsee when visiting a national park, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. Elopements are all about fulfilling experiences that align with the things you value, and I’ll always shout from the rooftops that there’s no wrong way to elope.

What if we don’t have a specific idea yet of what we want our day to look like?

One of the best parts of eloping is that there’s so many options! If you’re sure you want to elope but you don’t know what you want it to look like, I have plenty of recommendations for activities, ways to include your loved ones, and locations that will take your breath away. If you just need a little guidance finding your unique elopement vision, I’ll help craft the right experience for you.

Convinced eloping is the way to go? If you’re feeling more confident than ever that eloping is the best decision for you, get in touch with me and let’s plan your dream day!